I Thee Wed . . . Part 2

 

The guests were seated, waiting for the show to begin. As we waited for our cue, Hunny and I turned to each other, both of us realizing that the kids had never practiced their entrances. Elroy led the way, standing where the two aisles converged, waiting to walk both his mothers to the altar. 

 

As the first sets of bridesmaids started walking, the younger kids (Bam-Bam walked with Peach.  Raspberry carried a second ring pillow and walked with Strawberry) forgot their last minute instructions. Alani and Adoree quickly stepped in and each walked with one set. We didn’t want to budget extra for real rose petals (all our flowers were artificial. The venue wouldn’t allow any fake flowers where they might get blown onto the green) so Peach and Strawberry carried baskets with arrangements instead of scattering petals.

 

Finally, it was our turn. Hunny and I walked down the short set of stairs to the grass before separating to each walk down our own aisle. We chose to walk alone (Hunny’s dad is not in her life, my dad wasn’t able to attend, and we’re both adults who choose to give ourselves to each other), meeting together to walk arm in arm with our oldest child for those last few steps.

 

I looked in her eyes as our friend told the story of how our love came to exemplify what is most important. Elroy bound our hands in a handfasting ceremony, tying the cord decorated with pictures of our children,

tokens of the family we had created together.

 

 

Hunny had tears in her eyes while I spoke the vows I had written.

 

And the summer sun was not the only reason my eyeliner ran down

my cheek while she spoke hers. 



 

We exchanged rings, smiling as we repeated our ‘with this ring’s. 

 

And then came the kiss.

 

I dipped her (like in the movies) . . .  Away from the audience.

(In fairness, that was the direction I usually dip her, and I got too swept up in the moment to make sure our friends and family could see us).

 

We walked back triumphantly through the crowd (many of whom forgot to use the bubbles we had provided), and burst into tears in each other’s arms once we got past the last row of chairs.

 

 

 The guests headed inside to enjoy the appetizers and ambiance while we took pictures. Our photographer even managed to get the

picture for our Christmas card this year.

 

 

All photos were taken by our fantastic Photographer Jaymee Lynn.

Here is her website or you can contact her on Facebook.



I thee wed (part one)

So we had our big day.

 

 A year of planning, thousands of dollars invested, headaches and heartaches along the way, drama from family and vendors . . .

 

And when it looked like it would be a disaster,

everything came together into the most amazingly perfect day.

 

 We won’t get the official photos back for about a month (because our photographer is a professional, and my eye liner ran down one cheek so she’ll have to fix every picture) but I couldn’t leave everybody waiting that long.

 

I promise I will share my favorites once I get them.

For now we only have the pictures our friends and family have shared with us.

 

 The big day started with mani – pedis at a crazy busy local nail art salon.

I chose sparkly French tips with crystals for the occasion . . . and not a single picture of them turned out. You’ll just have to wait for the official ones to see them, I guess.

Hunny went a bit bigger with 3D roses and dark purple crystals

to accent her French tips . . .

One of Hunny’s bridesmaids, Dashie, (who we had worried wouldn’t be able to make it) was able to get off work early, met us for lunch (because it was 11:30 by the time our toes were done). She totally came through for us at the last minute.

 After lunch she helped us get our stuff to the hotel, hung out (and kept the mood light) while we got our hair done in our room, followed our taxi

with the stuff we had to bring to the venue.

Dashie was a superstar and totally helped keep things going more smoothly

(and she rocked her purple dress).

 

My sister’s medical procedure ended up being too difficult and painful for her to join us. While we missed her greatly there was no way she could have participated

(in fact, pain killers and sleep were really all she could manage afterward).

 

Once we got to the venue, we had a chance to enjoy all the sweet, thoughtful touches the staff had for us. Hunny’s niece, CareBear, did our makeup (and did great, we were the ones who forgot the waterproof eyeliner). The A/C unit had gone out for the building (including the reception hall), so the staff had ordered

portable industrial units to keep everybody from melting.

 

Adoree and Alani arrived with our children in tow (and got them ready for us while CareBear did our makeup).  Both of our dresses had corset backs, plus we both had amazing corsets on underneath. There was much lacing
(with Dashie the only one who knew how to tighten the corsets),

and neither dress ended up tight enough (we kept pulling the backs up all night).

 

But when it was time to walk  . . . everything was perfect.

Because I was walking to meet Her.

 

 

 

 

(Update on my missing brother: It has been over 3 weeks since he disappeared. Search and Rescue did an exhausting and very thorough, search and other than a few early leads has come up with nothing substantial. It appears that he made his way out of the forest, but that just means he could be anywhere. Here's the post that has all the links for the search.) 

Feminine Ideals

Art in the Girls’ Room

We got the second crib moved into the office / girls’ room. This is big. Now the girls are in their room full time, and my Hunny and I are alone in our room again.

As we moved furniture we discussed what to do with the art already in the room. Half the room has the usual little girl unicorns, butterflies and princesses. The other half has fantasy swords (high on the wall) and art prints. The question of what to do with the art made me rethink what each piece means to me.

3 of the 4 pictures depict some version of womanhood but not the old Disney version.

Above the printer is a poster Hunny was given called ‘Illusion Chess’

It doesn’t have much meaning for me but it’s a fun image and I really like it.

Next to the computer is ‘Ex Libris” by Michael Parkes.

I love books, so the young woman so engrossed that her nudity doesn’t matter resonates deeply.

Above one of the cribs is ‘Gargoyles” also by Michael Parkes.

 

The idea that a little girl’s whimsy is powerful enough to bring stone to life to play with her . . .

Above the changing table (used to be above a bookshelf before things were rearranged) is ‘Serra Angel’ a large version of the art from the Magic: The Gathering card by the same name. 

 Serra is fiercely beautiful. She is both protector and avenger and is beautiful in full armor. She is strength personified and I want my girls to see that women can be strong and glorious. That beauty does not have to wait to be rescued, or avenged. That it is their responsibility to defend and protect, just as it is their brothers. I want my daughters to grow up knowing they are powerful. That they can change their world.

Hunny suggested putting Serra up in the boys room, or in our room where it would fit the décor better. I think I want it to stay where it is.    

Lately I’ve spent a lot of time reading really fantastic feminist blogs. Many of these are from women who spent part of their lives in very strict religious orders and had to break free in order to live as a complete person.

Love Joy Feminism by Libby Anne, and Permission to Live by Melissa are a couple of my favorites. 

Whether my girls take away as much or any of what I see in the art in their room doesn’t matter as much as having those images of the intelligence, magic and power of the feminine for my girls (and boys) to see. And hopefully, in seeing Believe.

And the World Turns . . .

Today is my 30th birthday.

In the 3 decades I've been on this planet I may not have changed the world, become famous, or become who I thought I'd grow up to be . . .

When I was in elementary school I dreamed of being a biochemist, of creating animals that didn't exist and designing a car that would run on smog.

Instead I have become a mother. I created children whom I hope will grow uo to be good people.

When I was in high school I wanted to become a veterinarian and work with horses.

Now I tend to bruises and scrapes, remove stitches and heal hurts with band-aids, perxoide, and a loving touch.

When I was in college I wanted to own a ranch and train horses.

Everyday I wrangle wild children and teach them to work together, to follow directions, to do their share, and hope to do so without breaking their spirit.

And I have accomplished so much more than I ever dreamed possible.
I have stood on the field inside the RCA Dome and preformed in front of tens of thousands from all over the country.
I have gotten back on the horse after nearly being thrown.

I have rafted the white water on the Kern River and smiled as we bounced off the rocks.

I swam in pools heated by hot springs and being fed on my mosquitoes the size of bison.

I helped clean the burns of a child who'd fallen into a fire pit, who's mother rode the bus to school with me.

I carried triplets who should not have survived, and learned that having them saved my life.

I kept my head when my child stopped breathing, and brought her back from the brink.

I have stretched pennies into dollars, kept the wheels turning and made sure we got by.

I have worked for a salary, worked to save money, and worked to keep it all together.

I have a wonderful husband beside me who works incredibly hard for us, for our family. He was my first love, my first kiss, and so many other firsts . . . my light in the darkness and my only love.
I have 5 beautiful children, 2 boys and 3 girls who teach me everyday. Who are my hope for the future. Who challenge me daily to be better, to show them how. Who changed how I view the world.
I have friends who have supported me in times of weakness and who have leaned on my strength when theirs ran out. We have laughed until we cried, loved even though distance made it hurt, cried on each other's shoulders when life pushed us down and pulled each other back up when it seemed we couldn't get back on our feet.
My friends, my sisters and brothers . . . I love you.
Thank you, my world would be a colder place without you.

Tonight I'm going out with my husband. We'll get some food, see a movie, spend a few precious moments together. To just BE with one another.

And that's all I really want for my birthday.

- Vixi



(P.S. Jewelry Giveaway is now closed. Any comments after 9pm pacific time will not be entered. Winner will be announced on Friday Jan. 13th.)